Tournament 4: Affirmations, Self-Destruction and Sucking

Well today I’m on the bag for Bear – something I swore I would never do (and think Bear would second that motion).  But here we are, and I am quite determined this will be peaceful and happy – or as near as possible !  The truth is that I have never caddied for Bear and almost never watch him and the reason is that it stresses me out (and probably him too). In practice I can hardly walk a hole before I’m being critical and judgmental and he’s being flippant.  There is so much more pressure on him and I hate the thought that I possibly add to it.

Just pushing the cart up a 45 degree angle to the first tee I’m out of breath and not sure how I’m going to do it for 18 holes.  It’s not going to be pretty.  Wet and muddy as a bog.  Bear says, “this hole is crazy“.  The whole thing is sloped to the right, Welsh sheep would feel quite at home !  Par.  Bear feels at home too.

Celebrate good fairway hits, come on …….. Bear is not amused at my singing, or his shot – but it is on the fairway.  Oh My God – he is ridiculously hard on himself (increasingly over the years to his detriment I’m afraid).  On the fairway – unhappy.  On the green – unhappy.  We have GOT to work on celebrating the Good !!!  Surely unhappy would have been in the woods or water …….?

I try affirmations : I’m awesomely grateful to be on the green ……

Bear: “That should have been a six iron”.

Oh My God.  If there is ever a candidate for an expert sport psychologist it is this child.  He can’t wait for his dad to come and take over ………..  A fellow mom on the bag (it is rare) started off with me but her husband has taken over and the 2 men are now shooting the breeze during our interminable wait.  We started 20 minutes late and are waiting on every shot.  Painful, painful, painful – on the bag and on the course.  And the thing is he is only 5 over after 7 holes – not the end of the world ….. but it feels like we are heading down the path of self destruction ………..

Anyway I was fired.  I seem to have been the “pinch-caddy” today and I’m fine with that.

Rob took 10 shots off his last score and broke 50 (48) with his father on the bag.

Maybe I really do suck………